


Reconciliation of the Truth

by timelostdoctor



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: (in chapter 3), Angst, Discussion of suicidal ideation, but it is there, i am aiming for so many emotions, i think, the shipping is not overt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-13 14:00:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29652393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/timelostdoctor/pseuds/timelostdoctor
Summary: The Doctor and Yaz find themselves trapped in a dark cave with the Master and no apparent way to escape.
Relationships: The Doctor/The Master (Doctor Who), Thirteenth Doctor/The Master (Dhawan), Thirteenth Doctor/Yasmin Khan
Comments: 8
Kudos: 45





	1. Chapter 1

The Doctor’s eyes flew open and she squinted into the darkness. Her head was pounding and she groaned as she sat up. She blinked a few times as she looked around. Yaz was lying a few feet away, curled in on herself almost as if she was asleep. There was one question answered. Yaz was safe. No, maybe not safe. But alive. Alive was better than the other option. She shifted onto her knees and crawled over to Yaz, gently shaking her. Yaz groaned as she woke as well, resting her head in her hands. 

As Yaz reacquainted herself with consciousness, the Doctor stood to look around. It was dark but as her eyes adjusted, she realized it wasn’t as dark as she had first thought. Rough, uneven stone walls surrounded them. She put her hand to one and it came away dry. The floor was hard stone, rocks, and dirt. 

Yaz’s voice came softly from a few feet away. “Doctor?”

“Here, Yaz.” The Doctor walked back to where she sat. “You alright?”

Without an answer, she pointed to the other body that lay against the far wall. The fear etched onto Yaz’s face was nothing compared to what the Doctor was feeling, like ice was pouring through her veins before being chased away, leaving only a hollow shell behind.

He had died. He had _died_. How was he here?

The Master gasped as he woke, jerking up from the ground with wide eyes. His chest heaved as he sucked in air. The Doctor watched as he did exactly as she had, looking around, taking in the surroundings. Finally, his eyes landed on the Doctor and Yaz and he scrambled to his feet, holding his hand out toward them as if to ward them off. He seemed almost panicked. “You are _not_ locking me in a vault again, Doctor. I won’t do it again.”

“This wasn’t my doing.” She glanced at Yaz and then frowned. “I have no clue how we got here.”

“Me either,” Yaz agreed. Both sets of eyes locked onto the Master.

The Master laughed. “I would love to gloat and hold whatever is going on over your heads, but I’m as lost as you are.”

The Doctor shoved her hands into her pockets, looking for her sonic screwdriver. As her hand closed around the device a sense of calm settled over her. If she had this she could get out of anything. 

“How did you survive? Gallifrey was destroyed and you were destroyed with it.” 

The Master smiled. “Never doubt my will to live, Doctor. Not while you’re around.”

It wasn’t an answer, they all knew it, but the Doctor knew better than to expect an answer from the Master. He strode forward. “At least I faced my death. You keep running from yours.”

“My friends needed me.”

His faced twisted and he snarled, “I needed you.” For a second, the Doctor thought she saw a flicker of something in his eyes. Something familiar. More than the rage and hatred. Was it hurt? Fear? Sorrow?

That couldn’t be right. 

Could it?

The Master’s jaw was clenched. The words had clearly slipped out unintentionally. He breathed, loud and heavy, through his nose as they stared at each other. 

Yaz’s voice broke them from their near-trance. “You were trying to kill her. To kill all of us.” The Doctor glanced at her and stepped closer, trying to protect her from whatever may come next. 

“Oh your little pet has a voice.” He laughed. “You have everyone fooled, don’t you. All this talk of good and kindness and you don’t believe a word.” He changed his gaze to Yaz and held up a finger. “Just wait. She’ll abandon you, too. She abandons everyone. She’s never really cared about anything but herself. Did she tell you she left me to explode on a ship next to a black hole?”

The embers of anger were always burning in her, always smoldering, waiting and jumping at the chance to catch into flame at the right event or word, and the Master was only adding fuel at the moment. She could feel it in her chest, in her arms. “ _I_ abandoned _you_?” She laughed, thought it was hollow. “You ran when I asked you to stand with me.”

“I didn’t run.” He advanced so their faces were only inches apart. “You never believed in me. No matter how many times I asked you to. No matter how many times I asked you to help me.” His hands were trembling. “You never wanted me to get better so I stopped trying. I’m just being what you want.” He opened his arms and smiled, backing away. “Being what the Doctor ordered.”

“You left. I needed you, and you left.” Her voice was shaking now as she and the Master locked eyes. “After everything I thought we had accomplished.”

The Master pulled in a breath and shook his head. He turned, running his hands through his hair and walked a few paces away before coming back. “No.” He poked himself in the chest. “I did good. I killed myself and I was coming back. I was doing what you taught me, Doctor. Doing what was right even thought it was hard. And I shot myself in the back.” He was trembling then. “It took me years to escape that ship. You had left me. Took the time to climb up to your Tardis and fly away and never once looked back for me.” He stilled and smiled. “You didn’t even think about me.”

The Doctor’s voice was low and disbelieving. “You’re lying. You were saving your own skin.”

The Master shook his head and walked away. “You never appreciate anything I give you. I give you an army and you blow it up. I give you goodness and you tell me I’m wrong. I give you _death_ —” he said, twirling to face her. “I give you death, which we both know you so desperately desire, and you run.”

The Doctor turned to Yaz. “We’re getting out of here. Come on.” Then she walked away, stuffing her trembling hands into her pockets, searching once again for the reassurances of the cold metal of the sonic screwdriver. Yaz caught her stride and stayed beside her as The Master followed along behind them. He was singing something lightly to himself though the Doctor tried her hardest to block it out.

They had walked for nearly fifteen minutes without meeting a single bend or different bit of landscape. “It’s gotta be a cave system of some kind,” the Doctor said, partially for Yaz’s benefit. 

“Yeah, no. It’s not.” The Master’s voice was smug behind them as the Doctor and Yaz turned to look. He was lying on his back on the ground, arms crossed behind his head. “You’ve not been going anywhere.”

“What?” Another look around showed the far side of the cave wall where they had woken up. “That’s not possible.” Sonic clutched in her hand, the Doctor scanned the area. “My readings say it’s all just stone.”

The Master sat up and shrugged. “Hope you brought snacks. Is that what your pet is for?”

The Doctor felt along the wall as she walked, starting with where they had all woken up. It seemed that, once they passed a certain spot, which she marked with a line drawn on in the dirt, they stopped moving forward. The sonic wasn’t giving any helpful readings, claiming they were in an enclosed hole in the rock. With a sigh, the Doctor sat with her back pressed to the cool stone wall. The ridges dug into her back. It looked and smelled and, after a small experiment, tasted like real rock. 

“What time is it?” The Doctor asked. “Anybody?”

“Either midnight or noon.” Yaz held up her wrist-watch. “How long do you think we’ve been here?” 

The Doctor shook her head. “Dunno. Let me have your watch.”

Without so much as a questioning look, Yaz handed the watch over. The Doctor studied it, turning it over twice, before scanning it with the sonic. “It’s not working. Time isn’t moving.” Her eyes flicked to where the Master was lying, looking up into the darkness above as if it were a star-filled sky. “You feel it, don’t you?”

“Of course.” The answer was softer than the Doctor had expected. 

The Doctor tapped her knee, looking off into a middle space, eyes fixed on a point on the far wall that she wasn’t really seeing. “If I can get time to move again, we can leave. I think that’s it. We need to make time move.”

“And how do we do that?” Yaz asked. 

The Doctor looked at her, lips pressed into a tight line. “I don’t know yet.”


	2. Chapter 2

The Doctor tried everything. Looking for a secret lever, climbing up the walls, even a ‘surprise attack’ of the line, all of which proved fruitless. None of them knew how long they had been there, only that it had been a long time. Long enough that the Doctor had tired herself out and plopped down next to Yaz. “I don’t know how to fix this.” She looked over at Yaz, eyes crinkled with worry. “I can’t get us out.”

“We can’t have been here long,” Yaz reasons. “I’m not hungry.”

The Master laughed. “I’ve been counting seconds and we have, in fact, been here for two days.”

Yaz shook her head. “No. I would have had to eat or drink. I’ve not even used the bathroom.” She turned to the Doctor, looking for reassurance. 

“I think he’s right. Must be some sort of stasis mechanism.” The Doctor let out a frustrated growl. “Why can’t I figure this out?” Her head thunked back back onto the stone. “I can’t do this again.”

Yaz and the Master shared a look, both looking for an explanation.  
  
Yaz reached out and touched the Doctor’s shoulder. She stiffened for a few second before she relaxed and looked down at her hands. “Do what, Doctor?” Yaz asked. 

The Doctor took a shuddering breath. “This has to be some form of prison. We’re trapped here and we can’t get out. I hate being locked into a small space.”

“Is that so?” The Master stood, his eyes narrowed. “You didn’t have a problem locking me away.”

The Doctor stood. “I saved your life. They were going to kill you.”

The Master shook his head. Head bent slightly to the ground, he looked up at the Doctor. “You kept me locked away for seventy years and you want me to feel bad that you’ve been here for two days?”

“No.” The Doctor walked forward. “I don’t want you to feel bad for me. I don’t want anything from you ever again. I am tired of this game you keep trying to play.” She glanced around the small room looking for something, anything, to latch onto, but there was nothing. Instead, the words kept coming. “I don’t understand where we went wrong, but we did and I can’t fix it. I’ve tried.” 

“I don’t need fixing.” The words were vicious, his nostrils flaring and eyes tightening. “I know exactly who I am.”

The Doctor opened her mouth to deny the accusation, but nothing would come out. The words lodged in her throat, refusing to move. Finally, as she settled on different words, they flowed. “That doesn’t mean you aren’t broken.” The forced pause had deflated the argument though and before the Master could say anything else, she held up a hand. “Yaz, lie to me.”

Yaz stilled, her mouth falling open slightly. “What?”

The Doctor turned and walked toward where Yaz had been pacing. “Tell me something that isn’t true. Anything.” 

“Um.” Yaz glanced around the cave as if it would give her a clue. “The sky is orange?”

The Doctor waved the statement away. “No, no, some skies are orange. Something more concrete.” The Doctor clicked her fingers together as she thought. “Ah! What’s your mother’s name?”

“Sonya.” The word came easy and the Doctor frowned.

The Doctor paced away, the deep line between her brow appearing as she thought. “That’s not right.” The Master and Yaz watched as she walked back and forth until she stopped suddenly, back ramrod straight. “Of course.” She rushed to Yaz, grabbing her shoulders. Their faces were mere inches apart as the Doctor gazed into Yaz’s deep brown eyes. “Tell me you hate me.”

In truth, the Doctor was terrified of the words leaving Yaz’s mouth. She warred with the decision the instant she had said it. She had meant to say something else, someone other than herself, but me had came before she could fully control her tongue. Yaz opened her mouth once, twice, and her eyes were glimmering. “I can’t,” she said. Her voice was soft, almost a caress, but the Doctor had to know.

“No, Yaz, it’s okay. I’m not asking if you hate me, I’m asking —”

Yaz grabbed the Doctor’s arms. “You’re not listening. I can’t say the words. They won’t come.” The flood of relief that filled the Doctor almost made her dizzy. Yaz didn’t hate her.”

The Doctor laughed. “Brilliant.” She released Yaz and grinned. “We can’t lie to each other here. Not about things that matter.” When her eyes landed on the Master, her smile slipped. “You really were coming back, then?”

“Like you care,” he said. “Like you’ve ever cared about me.”

The muscle in the Doctor’s jaw clenched as she tried to hold back the words she wanted to say. They would only ever give him the upper hand, but she couldn’t hold them back. “I’ve always cared about you. You’ve always been one of the most important people in my life.” She squeezed her eyes shut. These words she willing said. “Why do you think I try so hard every time we meet? I had finally given up on you after Missy and now you’re saying I was wrong for that.” She opened her eyes and met his. “I’m never going to be able to give up on you now.”

The Master swallowed. “You’re lying.”

The Doctor shook her head. “I’m not. You try lying to me. Lie to me, Master.” 

She didn’t know what words he was trying to say, but his mouth opened and closed several times as he tried. With a deep, guttural growl, he turned to the stone wall and punched it. 

The Doctor’s eyes widened. “Now there’s an idea.” She turned to Yaz with a grin. “Once, I was trapped in my own confession dial. I broke free by punching through twenty feet of diamond. We can get out of here.”

“They trapped you in your confession dial?” The Master’s voice was low. If the Doctor didn’t know better, she would say it was concerned.

“Like you didn’t know. It made it to Gallifrey somehow.”

The Master set his jaw. “It wasn’t me.” After a moment of silence, he spoke again. “How long did that take?”

“Should take less time with the three of us.” She flashed a smile and turned to the stone wall, but the Master’s hand was on her shoulder, whirling her around. 

“How long?”

“Best estimation? About 4.5 billion years.” She looked back to the wall in front of her, her hearts pounding as she felt the heat of both the Master and Yaz’s gaze. “I kept getting reset so I don’t really remember most of it. The century in prison felt longer.” She had let her guard down a little to much and the words had slipped out.

The Master and Yaz spoke at once. 

“They’re lucky they’re all dead, or I would kill them again just for that.”  
“A century. And you let me whine on about ten months?”

The Doctor was growing to despise the cave. It seemed to be working against her, turning everything she had striven for, everything she was holding onto, out into the universe. “I learned patience and how to escape. I think that’s what we should take from my experiences.”

“That isn’t a silver lining.” Yaz was by her side, hovering as always. Wanting to reach out, to touch, to comfort. She had once let her companions do just that. Why had she stopped? Fear of losing them? Of getting her heart broken again? To late for any of that. She took Yaz’s hand and smiled at her. 

After a moment, the Doctor dropped Yaz’s hand and turned back to the wall. “I think we’re all angry right now and that’s probably a good thing.” Without warning she yelled, pulling her fist back and punching the wall as hard as she could. The rough wall cut through her skin and the force sent shock waves of pain up her arm. She paused for a moment, cradling her hand. Then gathering her strength and courage, she punched it again, this time crying out at the pain. She bit her lip to cut the cry short, but it had already been noticed. 

“Doctor, stop it!” Yaz took the Doctor’s hand and held it in her own, examining it. “We don’t have medical supplies. This isn’t going to work.” 

The Doctor looked between Yaz and the wall before crumpling to the ground. “The how do we leave, Yaz?”

“I don’t know.” Yaz lowered herself to the ground and sat next to the Doctor, their shoulders pressed together.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are talks of suicidal ideation in this chapter. They aren't detailed but are direction mentioned. Also I found someone willing to suffer through editing for me, so everyone give a well-deserved round of applause to verynearlysouffled! She has her own great fics, go check them out.

Despite knowing it would sting, the Doctor kept pressing on the fresh wounds on her knuckles. The three of them had found themselves sitting in a circle in silence. None of them knew what to say or do. She was keeping her mind locked tight, wary of any telepathic communications the Master may try to send her way. No doubt Yaz was thinking about Earth and a little flat in Sheffield. She frowned as her eyes landed on the Master’s unfocus gazed. She wouldn’t pretend she knew enough about him anymore to guess at what he was thinking.

She replayed everything that had happened since they all woke up in the darkened cave. Her mind kept snagging on something, and she wanted to address it, but where was it? Early on, she knew, but when?  _ You never appreciate anything I give you. _ Oh. There. With a glance at Yaz, she reached out to him with her mind, but he batted her away. 

“You’re wrong, by the way. I don’t want to die.” She felt two sets of eyes burning through her, but she focused on the Master’s. “I don’t.”

The Master scoffed. He brought his knees up to rest his arms and leaned forward. “Since when?”

The Doctor gave a noncommittal shrug. “I don’t know.”

“That’s why you couldn’t push the button.” It wasn’t an accusation or a question. Just a statement. Almost an observation. The Master’s face softened ever so slightly as he looked at her. When that didn’t elicit an answer he leaned back, hands splayed on the ground behind his back. “I thought for sure this was all over then. I was so ready.”

The Doctor met his gaze. Her voice was smaller than usual. She hated talking about this stuff. What she was feeling, what she was thinking. Why did they have to be stuck in this cave that not only prevented them from lying, but pushed the truth front their lips instead of letting them hold it back. She felt like every bottle she’d ever filled and pushed down deep inside her now had a leaky seal that was threatening to break. “I’m not. I don’t know why. I was. You know I was. We were-” Her voice cracked, and how she hated how weak she felt. “We were getting close again. I thought I was getting my Koschei back.” The last few words left her at barely more than a whisper. 

All at once she felt his presence swirling around her, asking to be let in. She looked up, doing nothing to hide the agony on her face, and shook her head. “I can’t. I get lost in there sometimes, now that you’ve opened so many sealed doors. Not after what you’ve done.”

She hadn’t expected a look of empathy from him, but it was what she received. “They deserved everything they got and more for what they did. I’m not sorry. I don’t regret it.” He swallowed and looked down, and in that instant, the Doctor could see O, could see the man he had pretended to be for years. 

But she knew him, knew he could be that. So how much had really been pretend?

Before she could get lost in her thoughts again, he took her hand. “I do remember the lessons I learned in the vault. The sounds, the begging, the  _ names _ . I told you once your brand of good isn’t always what’s right and I stand by that. What I did on Gallifrey was justified.”

“And the Cybermasters?”

He set his jaw and though the muscle twitched, he didn’t speak. After a moment, he laid back and groaned, throwing an arm over his eyes.

It was only then, when silence fell and she knew the conversation wouldn’t go any further, that she realized she was clutching Yaz’s hand. She looked down at them and quickly let go, her mouth falling open and apologies spilling out when she recognized the glossy look of Yaz’s eyes. Yaz pulled the Doctor’s hand back shaking her head. “No, no, you weren’t hurting me.” Even so, a tear fell down her cheek and she hastily wiped it with a breathless sigh. She looked like she was struggling to hold back the words, so with a gentle squeeze of her hand, the Doctor nodded. 

“It’s okay to say it, Yaz. The cave compels you.” The Doctor waved her hand in the air as she said the last line, trying her best to sound like a magician. 

The words rushed out of Yaz so fast the Doctor had trouble keeping up. There was so much coming from Yaz. Incredulity that the Doctor would ever want to die, a story about Yaz’s own battle with depression and how that had led her to her profession, about how travelling with the Doctor made her feel alive in aways that she didn’t know were possible and gave her life the meaning that everyone was always searching for. The Doctor let her speak, uninterrupted except by the Master’s decidedly fake snores. It was nearly two hours before the whole tale ended.

Yaz was breathing heavily as she looked at the Doctor, a mix of fear and relief on her face. The Doctor opened her mouth but her mind was too busy buzzing with all Yaz had said to give her words for herself. “Yaz, I -- I don’t know what to say.” Her eyelids fluttered closed, her mind flashing to Graham’s face when he had divulged his worries onto her and she had said something about being socially awkward. Why did this body have to do this? Why couldn’t she think of anything, not even platitudes? She licked her lips and opened her eyes again to meet Yaz’s warm brown eyes. She took a deep breath and forced down the fear and anxiety, catching on words she’d said that Yaz had parroted back at her. “I meant it, though, when I said we can’t have a universe without Yaz. That would be like a rainbow without color or a sun without warmth.”

“Or a Dalek without hatred.” The Master laughed and stood, pacing the small area. “You know humans are just blips, Doctor. I have never understood why you bother with them, even if I did like the last one.” He stopped, his hands clenching together. “We have to get out of here.” He picked up a pebble and hurled it at the line the Doctor had drawn in the dirt, watching as it sailed passed the line and bounced twice. 

Yaz gripped the Doctor’s arm. “Is the barrier still there?”

The Doctor grinned. “Let’s find out!” Hand in hand with Yaz, feet pounding on the cave floor, they flew passed the line that had been drawn. With cheers they gained speed until, once again, their surroundings weren’t changing. They slowed to a stop and the Doctor drew another line, her eyes shining as she looked at Yaz with a dawning realization. “Of course. Tell me something else. Something important.”

From just behind her, the Master’s voice burrowed itself into her ear. “Why don’t you share, Doctor? The poor girl all but confessed to being in love with you. Give her a bone.”

The jovial mood drained. Despite knowing there wasn’t a point to putting her guard up, to trying to save the walls she had built around herself from crumbling, she did her best to fortify them. With a falsely cheery smile, she nodded. “What do you want to know, Yaz?” She hoped the thudding of her hearts wasn’t apparent to anyone else, or the way she could barely breathe. 

Yaz’s eyes darted to the Master for a second before looking into the Doctor’s eyes. She swallowed and fixed her footing, as if preparing for battle. “How long are you going to let me stay with you, Doctor?”

The words stabbed into the Doctor as they fell from Yaz’s mouth, as Yaz’s voice, normally so strong, shook. “What do you mean?” A pit had already formed in her stomach, filled with ice and fear. She wanted to put her hands in her ears, scream into the void, and pretend this wasn’t happening. She knew what was coming next, but she needed the time to think. 

“Jack said that when you…” Yaz trailed off and closed her eyes, breathing deeply. Her eyes snapped back open, focused on the Doctor’s hazel, pinning her with just a look. “Jack said when someone travels with you, they don’t get to choose when it stops. So how much more do I get with you?”

“It’s not that simple, Yaz.” The Doctor felt frozen to the spot, terrified to open her mouth for the words that might jump out. “Most of the time it isn’t up to me, either. It’s the universe.” There was the burning in her eyes and throat, the tightening of her chest. “I told you, traveling with me isn’t safe.”

Yaz lowered her brow into a frown. “So you just accept it?”

“No!” The Doctor hadn’t meant to shout but she was already finding it difficult to see clearly. “Sometimes I don’t have a choice in the matter, Yaz. Sometimes it’s my friends or the universe. And when I try to choose the people I love they get angry at me for it.” The Doctor sunk to her knees, thoughts of dark hair and a pinstripe suit pressed against a cursedly solid wall. Thoughts of fingers connected to a temple surrounded by ginger hair as his best friend begged him not to. She pressed a fist to her mouth and held her breath so as to not let the sobs come. A voice, floating away in the wind.  _ Raggedy man, goodbye. _ Outstretched hands welcoming the caw of a raven. The robotic voice of a cyberman declaring they are human.  _ Hello, Sweetie.  _ “It isn’t my fault,” she gasped. “I try to keep them all safe. I do.” She swiped at her face, tears and snot and drool coming away. She cleans her hands on her pants, refusing to look at Yaz or the Master. “I’m never enough.”

Suddenly there was a gentle warmth on her face. A thumb rubbed away the tears from her cheek as soft hand found its way into hers. The Doctor was still working on getting her breathing under control but she looked up to see Yaz, her eyes also filled with tears. “I’m sorry,” Yaz said, her voice thick. “I didn’t know. I’m sorry.”

It was an impulse, one she normally would have squashed without second thought, but they were in this cave and time still wasn’t moving and nothing beyond the cave mattered, anyway, so the Doctor threw herself forward, wrapping her arms tightly around Yaz. Her head nestled into the crook of Yaz’s neck. She took a deep, shuddering breath. Maybe this would only make it worse when Yaz did leave, letting herself have even this one moment. Still, the feeling of Yaz wrapping her arms around her back, of Yaz pulling her practically onto her lap as they sat there, not saying anything, it was enough to banish the thoughts for now. With every stroke of her hair or brush up her back the Doctor felt herself relax into Yaz’s hold, felt her heartbeats slow and her breath come easier. 

If only she could stay there in that warmth, that comfort, that love, forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ack! This one was so satisfying to write. Thank you guys so much for reading! I'd love to hear what you're thinking so far. See you next chapter!


	4. Chapter 4

It was rare for the Doctor to feel embarrassment but that was all she felt when she finally extracted herself from Yaz’s hold. Yas remained sitting as the Doctor stood and paced to the last line she had drawn, walking until the next invisible barrier. “Right, well. We’re making progress.” She tried for a bright and cheery smile, the ones that always set people at ease, but her eyes were still red and the smile felt tight, and she knew it wasn’t working. 

She stood there for a moment, studying the line she had drawn. If it was their buried truths the cave wanted, then it was buried truths the cave could have. She looked back at Yaz and the Master and her eyebrows raised. It seemed they were having a conversation. Their bodies were both tensed, as if ready to flee, but their faces were more relaxed as they spoke. She looked back at the barrier and prodded it with her toe, but nothing happened. It wouldn’t move beyond the line. 

The Doctor looked back at her companions, this time to make sure they were well and truly distracted. She looked forward and whispered to the barrier. “I’m terrified at what being the Timeless Child might mean.” Just saying the words out loud raised her pulse. “Not knowing who or what I am gives me nightmares. As happy as I am that Ryan and Graham got out alive and happy, I also feel resentful. Like they used me and now they’re done with me.” She looked back again, seeing that she now had an audience. She gave them a small smile and waved. 

“What are you doing?” Yaz called.

The Doctor turned back to the wall. “Telling my secrets. It’s what it wants, after all, and I’ve got loads. More than enough to get us out, I’d wager. See.” She stepped forward, pressing hard to move away from the line she had drawn. Not even a hair would budge. With a frustrated yell, she kicked the line and stormed off, her anger keeping her going to where they started before she turned back. “That didn’t work.”

“Of course it didn’t work,” The Master said. “You have to share what you said. So out with it, what was it?”

The Doctor’s eyes widened as she felt the words building themselves again. She shook her head. “No.” 

“Come on now,” he said, his voice almost sickly sweet. “Just say it. Wouldn’t it be a  _ good _ act? Admitting your faults. Isn’t that what you taught me?” He took a step closer, his eyes boring into her soul. “When you kept me locked in a place not unlike this.”

Then Yaz was between them. “Whatever she did, you probably deserved it. You’re a horrible person.”

Surprised covered his face before he laughed loudly, the sound echoing off the stone walls surrounding them. “You think she hasn’t murdered people?”

“You burned your whole planet!” Yaz yelled.

“So. Did. She.” 

Yaz opened her mouth to argue and then stopped. She turned slowly to look at the Doctor. “What is he talking about?”

The Doctor glanced between them. Tension filled the air as no one spoke or moved, all focused on her. Normally it was her favorite place to be, the center of attention, having everyone around, but right then she would have given her hand to have been invisible. “It’s complicated,” she said finally. 

“No it’s not.” Yaz looked back at the Master. “You’re lying, you have to be.”

“I’m not,” he said. He looked over at the Doctor, a look of calm honestly she was starting to recogonize on his face. “She and I are so very alike.”

The Doctor did her best to force herself away from her words. She couldn’t have a repeat of earlier. “I did burn it. Everything, to the ground. Animals, plants, people.” She swallowed. “Children. Everyone and everything.” Yaz looked horrified, though she didn’t back away. “The Time War was destroying everyone, threatening all life. It was the only way to stop it and I found a way to not kill everyone, in the end.”

“Which was a mistake, honestly.” The Master met The Doctor’s gaze, a challenge in his eyes. Begging for an argument. 

The Doctor picked up the gauntlet. “You children were there.”

“So were yours.”

“I didn’t have a choice. It was the only way.”

The Master tilted his head. “I know,” he said. “I felt the same way. How else would they pay for what they did to us. To you?”

Silence settled again as the Doctor warred with herself. It was all so much. Too much. “What do you mean, what they did to her?” Yaz’s voice broke over her in waves. Was Yaz asking the Master? She looked up, shocked, and met his gaze. He simply tilted his head in the opposite direction and raised his eyebrows. 

The Doctor turned. If she pretended she was talking to herself, if she acted as if no one else could hear her, perhaps it would be easier. “On Gallifrey, the Master discovered new information about my past. Things I don’t remember. I’ve lived so many lives. Came from somewhere else.” The burning in her eyes wasn't from sadness this time, but anger. Righteous anger, the sort that always led her to mistakes. “I’m not even Gallifreyan. I was taken from a portal and experimented on. I made the Time Lords what they are and then they took it from me.” She took in a deep breath. It wouldn’t do to be this angry here. “They took my memories and forced me to regenerate into a baby. It’s no wonder I never felt at home there, that I always wanted to leave.” Her eyes found the Master’s. “But it was still my home. Our home.”

The Master scoffed. “And yet the only time you went back was to kick the ruler off the planet to save your little human friend. I thought you would be happy to know what you’re running from now.”

“Remember what I told you, Master. I said you hadn’t broken me.” She forced another smile. It hadn’t been a direct lie, since she had said those words to him before. She was just glad the cave had allowed it. “Now, let’s get out of here.” She turned and held her hand out to Yaz who hesitated before taking it. The Doctor frowned at that, but if she wanted free from this cave, she couldn’t dwell on that now. “I tried telling the barrier my secrets, but it didn’t work. You have to hear them, too.” She swallowed. “I promise you, Yaz, that I will get you home.” 

She led them to the line, trying it again and finding that it had moved. “I reckon we all tell something and then we can move forward until we get out of here. What do you say, fa-” she cut the word off with a scowl. 

Yaz gripped her hand tighter. “I hate that this is the most I’ve learned about you in two years.” 

The Doctor looked at the Master who held up his hands and nodded. “Fine, fine.” He looked away from her and muttered his words, though the Doctor could barely hear them. “I miss when we were just Theta and Kochei. When we were always together. When I didn’t feel lesser than you. When you didn’t look down on me. It used to be us against the world instead of us fighting on each other.”

The Doctor felt herself soften. Her hand reached out to him and he grasped it. “I miss that, too,” she said. “And Kos, I have never thought you were lesser than I am. Even when you’re my worst enemy, you are my greatest friend.”

The Master’s lips twitched up into a genuine smile. “Best enemies?”

The Doctor nodded. “Best enemies.”

As one, the three of them stepped forward. 

It took more breakdowns, more fighting, more and more and more words pried from unwilling lips, but finally, there was light just a few short feet away. Just a few more confessions and they would be free.

Or that was the Doctor’s working theory. It was entirely possible that the light led into a room just like this one. Or back to the start of the cave. Or...anywhere, really. They had stopped for a break after going for what had to have been hours. They didn’t stop and discuss what was said, even as the words broke their hearts. The Doctor truly hadn’t realized how much anger Yaz held toward her, or how much affection the Master had. But the emotions were taking their toll on them all.

Her own words were the most bitter for her. She had to come clean about her feelings and what she had done and she knew, she knew, she had barely scratched the surface of what she remembered. They were all drained from the work but with their best chance of escape so close, she couldn’t settle her mind. What would get them out of the cave? What should she confess next? 

The Doctor’s eyes landed on Yaz who was sitting comfortably next to the Master. Learning each other's darkest secrets had brought a comradery she had missed. As always, she felt her hearts clench at the thought of ever actually losing either of them. 

She knew what she had to confess.

They had been standing at the line and moving forward as they could but this time, she knelt in front of the Master and Yaz, eyes flicking between both of them. “The greatest fear of my life is being left completely alone. That one day I won’t be enough for you or for anyone. That I won’t be good enough, or fast enough, or smart enough, or impressive enough, or enough of anything to have anyone want me.” 

“Doctor,” Yaz started, but the Doctor held up a hand to silence her. 

“I love you. Both.” She held their gaze and gave them a sad smile. “One day, it won’t take a tragedy for me to be able to say those words.” Then she stood and held out her hands, one for each of them. They walked the few feet it took to get to the last barrier line and carefully stepped over it. Each step took them closer to the light. They stopped just before it and with hopeful smiles, stepped into the light. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed this! I would love a commment about your thoughts. See you with a new story soon!

**Author's Note:**

> I have a plan! And I am going to try to keep a loose schedule with this and my goal is to update no more than once a day. I don't expect it's going to be a novel, probably no more than 10k words, but it is my first time writing the Master and he is such fun! Let me know your thoughts! I do accept constructive criticism if you have any.


End file.
